Teenagers at isolated camp on Friday 13th dutifully prepare to be murdered

A GROUP of teens staying at an isolated location have realised it is Friday October 13th and are resigned to their inevitable murders.

Cool teacher actually completely negligent

A POPULAR and inspirational English teacher puts no effort into her job whatsoever, she has admitted.

Female friend of gay man secretly believes he will one day turn straight

THE longtime female friend of an out and proud gay man secretly believes he will one day become straight, she has revealed.

Woman reads latest Weinstein story, rolls eyes, gets on with job

A WOMAN has rolled her eyes at the latest Harvey Weinstein revelations and then got on with doing her job, it has been confirmed.

Naive woman grateful for invitation to hen weekend in Dublin

A WOMAN is understood to be 'really excited' about an upcoming hen weekend she believes will be 'a lot of fun'.

Ten-year-old who can beat up everyone in school accepts his life has peaked

A TEN-YEAR-OLD who can beat up anyone at his school has accepted that life will not get any better than this.

Middle-aged man in running shorts 'asking for it' with provocative outfit

A MIDDLE-aged man has caused a stir at work by donning a provocative outfit that clearly shows he is 'asking for it'.

‘No deal’ Brexit plan suspiciously similar to Middle Ages

GOVERNMENT plans for leaving the EU without a trade deal seem to involve living in a 14th century agrarian society, experts have noted.