Society

Twitter bios must go 'serious, serious, wacky'

ALL Twitter bios must contain two serious pieces of information followed by a third zany one.

Northern Lights ‘are Daily Mail reader LSD’

THE Aurora Borealis is the closest thing Daily Mail readers will ever have to a psychedelic experience, they have confirmed.

Britain to get lessons in things you obviously shouldn’t do

BRITONS are to receive coaching in how not to do things that are clearly wrong.

Britain celebrates St Hangover's Day

BRITAIN is marking St Hangover's Day with shivering bouts of vomiting.

Discussion thread composed entirely of f**kwits

AN online discussion thread does not contain a single person who knows what they are talking about.

IVF attacked by people who create nothing but worthless, pointless crap

IVF reproduction has been attacked by a pair of fashion designers who have created a mountain of overpriced rubbish.

Guardian fascinated by Wetherspoon’s breakfasts

THE Guardian has launched an investigation into why people choose to have breakfast at Wetherspoon’s.

Barista convinced someone will notice he’s playing his band's demo

A COFFEE shop barista is sure today will be the day a customer notices that he is playing his band’s demo.