Guitar in flat for decorative purposes only

AN acoustic guitar in the corner of a living room has never been played and is irrevocably out of tune, it has been revealed.

Yoga newcomers discover it is possible to be simultaneously bored and in pain

PEOPLE trying yoga for the first time have discovered its unique combination of tedium and extreme physical discomfort.

People putting too much emphasis on shit opinions, say experts

PEOPLE are continuing to place too much emphasis on stupid opinion about things that are not important.

Being a father finally pays off

FATHERS across Britain are looking forward to Sunday when a year of parenting finally pays dividends.

Weird Dreamland promises disturbingly magical day out

A RE-OPENED theme park is promising visitors a wondrous and deeply unsettling experience.

Most Britons wouldn’t say anything if ISIS moved in next door

MORE than two-thirds of Britons have admitted they would quietly condone militant Islamism if it bought the house next door.

Men plucking up courage to spend summer in Y-fronts

MEN are hoping to walk the streets this summer wearing nothing but their underpants.

Luxury London development ruined by actual resident

AN EXCLUSIVE City development of £1m apartments has been scandalised by the revelation that someone lives there.