Society

Toyota Yaris is ideal Mother’s Day gift, suggest advertisers

YOUR mother deserves a £14,095 five-door Yaris Icon, Toyota has suggested.

Britain still thinks petitions aren't completely ignored

PEOPLE across the UK are continuing to sign petitions as if they make any difference to anyone.

BBC has to explain what ‘fracas’ means

BRITAIN is now the sort of place where it is necessary to explain to adults what ‘fracas’ means, it has been confirmed.

Drinks with green stuff floating in them ‘clearly flawed’

THERE is nothing to be gained by adding plant matter to a drink, it has been claimed.

Race horses changing names by deed poll

INCREASING numbers of Britain’s race horses are changing their original idiotic names, it has emerged.

Indifference to babies now illegal

ANYONE who does not have a fanatical love of babies will be sent to prison, the government has warned.

Woman inspires others by not uploading photos of post-baby body

A 26-YEAR-OLD woman has not posted pictures of her body shortly after having a child, inspiring others to be less moronic.

Last remaining CD tower demolished

THE UK's last remaining CD tower, capable of holding more than 88 albums, has been destroyed.