Society

80 per cent of men are twats

THE majority of men are either meatheads or vain self-absorbed idiots, it has emerged.

Porn 'age gates' appeal to teenage boys' innate sense of honour

AGE restrictions on pornography websites work because teenage boys are never deceitful, it has been claimed.

Mothers warned not to get used to this

MUMS have been reminded that things will be straight back to normal after Sunday.

ISA changes delight tedious bastards

DULL people are over the moon about the new 'super ISA' savings scheme.

Smoothie label includes dark sexual fantasies

A MANGO smoothie has admitted having warped desires, via a block of text on its packaging.

The heartbreaking moment Mail Online journalist realised his soul had died

THIS picture shows the very moment at which a journalist discovered he had died inside.

Prisoners face roach crisis

A BAN on books in British prisons has deprived inmates of makeshift cigarette filters, according to insiders.

Everyone too up themselves to make the tea

WORKERS are going without hot drinks because everyone in the office thinks they're above making tea, it has emerged.