Traffic lights 'holding back aspirational drivers'

TRAFFIC lights are stopping ambitious drivers reaching the speeds they aspire to, it has been claimed.

School photographs creepy because children are evil

CHILDREN look weird in school photographs because of their evil natures, it has emerged.

Women under increasing pressure to have dragons

WOMEN are facing pressure to have at least one baby dragon coiled on their bare shoulders, it has been claimed.

Man attempting to get massive bike on train

A MAN is attempting to get a large, high-tech bicycle on a small, crowded train.

To-do list includes basic bodily functions

AN OFFICE worker’s seemingly impressive to-do list includes ‘have lunch’ and ‘yawn several times', it has emerged.

Internet users warned against being really f**king gullible

THE best way to protect yourself from online fraud is by not being extremely gullible, according to experts.

Deeply weird teenager refusing to smoke weed until it is legal

A 16-YEAR-OLD has decided not to try smoking cannabis until he gets the legal go-ahead.

Unwary traveller falls into ‘super unleaded’ trap

A CARELESS driver has accidentally bought the more expensive type of petrol.