THE announcement that women's double chins are to be called 'mashed mellows' means every bit of lady fat now has a cute-but-hateful name.
ALL children born after 2022 will be born out of wedlock, and lead a life of moral and spiritual poverty, according to research.
A RELUCTANCE to embrace gingerness is fuelling anti-ginger prejudice, it has been claimed.
CITIES work brilliantly apart from being unsuitable for humans, it has been claimed.
GLEE-STYLE 'prom nights' are just shit school discos repackaged for the gullible, it has emerged.
LEADING scientists have warned Britons not to attempt doing any work today.
EVERY aspirational Facebook photo must be posted with an equally miserable picture, under new social media guidelines.