Woman shocked to discover husband is a twat

A 31-YEAR-OLD woman has been traumatised by the discovery that her husband is a bit of a twat.

Woman won’t let frostbite stop her wearing Converse

A WOMAN has vowed that she will wear thin-soled canvas trainers through the depths of winter no matter what the cost.

Scottish people refer to all fizzy drinks as 'juice'

SCOTTISH people describe every fizzy drink as 'juice', despite no 'juicing' having taken place.

Anti-EU campaigners secretly hoping Britain stays in so they can keep whining

PEOPLE campaigning for Britain to leave the EU privately hope the country stays in so they can keep bitching about it.

Helmet camera cyclist thinks he’s Judge Dredd

A CYCLIST with a helmet camera has vowed to bring justice to the roads in the uncompromising style of Judge Dredd, it has emerged.

Fun bits of having a kid work out at £1,200 per hour

THE overall cost of raising children means that the fun bits of parenthood cost over £1,200 per hour, it has emerged.

Bathroom cupboard full of non-essential oils

A WOMAN’S bathroom cabinet is brimful of distilled, cleansing, pointless lotions.

Proper grown-ups blissfully ignorant of latest Twitter row

PROPER grown-up humans have no idea why a celebrity has deleted his Twitter account.