Britons demand to live in medieval village surrounded by a wall

MEMBERS of the public have told politicians they will not settle for anything less than living in a small village surrounded by a high wall.

Couple saving to take parents out and ask them for a mortgage deposit

A COUPLE are setting aside money so that they can take their parents to a local restaurant and beg for a house deposit.

Gentrifier couple show terrified middle class parents around their new area

A YOUNG couple have given their frightened relatives a tour of the deprived but ‘up and coming’ area where they have bought a flat.

Worker enters seventh year of anger

AN OFFICE worker has been furious with his colleagues, clients and all office equipment for seven years straight, it has emerged.

Brexiters flock to see ‘Weeping Di’ memorial plate

‘OUT’ voters are flocking to see a Princess Diana plate that weeps real tears, it has emerged.

UK witchcraft up 700 per cent

WITCHCRAFT has increased by around 700 per cent across Britain in the last 12 months.

Man leaves speaker by open window to let everyone know how bad his taste in music is

A MAN has left his speaker by an open window in the hope that people will hear how awful his taste in music is and recommend something good.

Northern family has no-nonsense day out

A FAMILY from Bolton has gone on a blunt, plain-speaking and principled day out at a theme park.