Society

Homeless man really enjoying jokes about his Rolls Royce

A HOMELESS man has confirmed that jokes about his Rolls Royce, 40-room mansion and millionaire status make living on the streets so much easier.

Women only care about money, says man who only cares about looks

A MAN who judges women entirely on their physical appearance is furious that they judge men on their wealth.

Man thinks anything he doesn’t understand must be easy

A MAN’S simple-minded ignorance has left him convinced that everything from teaching to programming a computer is easy.

Mum claims to get mistaken for daughter although that is clearly bollocks

A 46-YEAR-OLD woman who claims people regularly mistake her for her 22-year-old daughter is clearly lying.

Ministers hopeful that pension age rise will finish you off

THE government is hoping to finish you off early by raising the state pension age, it has been claimed.

Bubble tea literally the spawn of the devil

BUBBLE tea containing mysterious ‘chewy pearls’ is the actual product of Lucifer’s evil loins, it has been confirmed.

Kids interchangeable

MOST parents would not notice if their kids were swapped for some other kids, it has emerged.

Getting thrown off plane ‘worth it to avoid stag weekend’

BEING imprisoned and heavily fined is better than going on a stag weekend, it has been claimed.