Prison escape lacks narrative drive

A real-life prison escape completely lacked the tension and excitement of Hollywood prison breaks, it has emerged.

J. Jonah Jameson appears at Leveson Inquiry

THE editor of the Daily Bugle has given evidence to the Leveson Inquiry about his newspaper's negative coverage of Spider-Man.

GCSEs to be replaced by Diploma in Mind-Bending Monotony

BUSINESS leaders have praised a new qualification that prepares students for a lifetime of servile drudgery.

Aung San Suu Kyi meets Grooverider

BURMESE pro-democracy campaigner Aung San Suu Kyi has met drum and bass DJ Grooverider, whose Radio 1 show helped sustain her while incarcerated.

Prince William desperate for threesome

THE Duke of Cambridge's '30 things to do before you're 30' list gives him less than 24 hours to have a threesome, it has emerged.

Fathers furious at being summoned from shed

FATHERS are demanding an end to Father's Day, after they were forced to leave their gardens to awkwardly receive a token gift.

Some people not into football

A SMALL number of English people are not responding correctly to football, it has emerged.

Camper van gives illusion of freedom

THE purchase of a camper van will not make your life meaningful or free, it has emerged.