Rival nans prepare for Christmas face-off

ELDERLY women across Britain are preparing to assert 'alpha nan' status over the family's other grandmother.

UKIP members may write to newspaper

THERE is a growing possibility that UKIP members may write to the newspapers about all this.

Smoking makes smokers more like non-smokers

SMOKING rots the brain until you start thinking like a non-smoker, it has been confirmed.

Alcohol price rise would reduce everyone's food intake

A MINIMUM alcohol price would make Britons cut back on less essential items like food, it has been claimed.

Baby Jesus did not eat full Christmas dinner, claims pope

POPE Benedict XVI has debunked the myth that baby Jesus's first meal was turkey with all the trimmings.

Slightly odd man anticipates record libel win

A MAN who lives on his own is expecting a record libel payout after being called ‘paedo’ by local teenagers every day for the past 16 years.