NEANDERTHALS did not die out but are still trying it on in town centre nightclubs, it has emerged.
JD WETHERSPOON is to open a zoo showcasing unusual and endangered humans, just off the M40.
EMPLOYERS offering dull jobs favour graduates with 2:2 degrees.
THE Guardian website's dating section is Page 3 for middle earners, it has been confirmed.
A SHIT flat in London now costs £500,000 thanks to widespread delusion about whether a property is really depressing.
A TOURISM body has produced a list of Britain’s best destinations for aggressive, anti-social behaviour.
ALMOST everyone that anyone has been to school with is a bigot, according to new research.