Pretending to be hard now a job

THE government is to reduce youth unemployment by making pretending to be hard an actual job.

Plain-looking students' exam success goes undocumented

STUDENTS who fall outside the bracket of 'nubile sexy girls' may or may not have gotten good A Level results.

Near death experience gets contemporary makeover

GOD has updated the 'near death experience' for the first time since the 70s.

Woman tells sad story then has photo taken on park bench

A WOMAN has revealed her anguish, heartbreak and anger before posing on a park bench.

Train companies praised for punctuality of fare increases

RAIL fare increases are to arrive bang on time yet again.

North goes into mourning

PEOPLE in the North will observe three days of mourning following the death of the founder of Pukka Pies.