Sense of humour vital to survival of human race

HUMANITY’S ability to laugh at itself is its best hope for survival, according to experts.

Age-gap relationships doomed by different children's TV memories

MOST relationships with an age gap fail because of differing children's television references, it has emerged.

Eight and a half million people trapped in London rapidly losing hope

THE record numbers of people now trapped in the capital believe they have little chance of returning to freedom.

The Shard now growing independently

LONDON’S Shard building has grown two new floors without anyone having worked on it.

Epiphany means shit presents can be listed on Ebay

MILLIONS of unwanted presents are being listed online to commemorate Jesus’s parents flogging their gifts from the wise men.

2015 already written off

THE current year has been abandoned as a waste of everyone's time after just five days.

Rail price increases make c-word go mainstream

THE announcement of increased train ticket prices has caused millions to use the strongest possible expletive.

Christmas summarised with a single grunt

BRITONS are describing their Christmas break to each other using a single semi-intelligible sound.