Couple’s wedding theme is ‘Look how rich our parents are’

AN engaged couple have decided to theme their upcoming wedding around their parents’ vast wealth.

God reserving harshest judgement for people who say ‘Fri-yay’

GOD has confirmed that people who use the term ‘Fri-yay’ to celebrate the end of the working week will face the most severe eternal judgement.

Grandmother given obscene birthday card

A MAN who loves humorous ‘bad taste’ birthday cards believed one would be appropriate for his 80-year-old grandmother.

Row turns ugly as wife compared to Brexit

A MARITAL argument has turned unexpectedly ugly after a man told his wife she was “like fucking Brexit.”

Toddler first to admit parents went too far with birthday party

A TWO-year-old has confirmed that her magic unicorn birthday party was a bit much.

Man baffled by people who come from different cultures doing things differently

A BRITISH man is baffled by the idea that people who come from different cultures do things differently to him.

Brexiter who talks about ‘sunlit uplands’ reminded he sounds like a psychopath

A BREXIT supporter who thinks Britain is entering the ‘sunlit uplands of a golden age’ has been reminded that it makes him sound insane.

Man who is not pedantic about tea 'should just go and live in Europe'

A MAN has been shunned by his colleagues for not caring whether tea is made in exactly the right way.