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STUPID PEOPLE STILL ALLOWED TO NAME CHILDREN |
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23-12-09 |
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IDIOTS producing smaller idiots will continue to be allowed to name them, it has been confirmed.
 Meet Theresanappforthat Thompson
Meanwhile, one little girl from Doncaster was named 0901 233 1212 after Jedward's phone voting number in this year’s X Factor.
Helen Archer, a registrar at Darlington Borough Council, said: "I've had to Botox my face to disguise the looks of disgusted disbelief . One couple wanted to name their daughter using the 'WingDings' font."
Although traditional names such as Kylie and Pikachu still dominate the list of popular names, this year's cultural phenomena showed their influence, with several children christened 'Quantitative Easing' and 'Climate Change Denier'.
A government spokesman said: "While we try to minimise the colossal risk many parents pose to their children - stopping them from getting the little ones drunk at their own christening, introducing them to the vague notion of peas, stuff like that - there are still many areas in which we can't interfere.
"Germany has the right idea with its list of officially-sanctioned names, but they all sound like the director's commentary in a scat video. So, swings and roundabouts, really."
Nikki Hollis, a Peterborough mother of six, said: "I just wanted my kids to have classy names, so I called them Diamonique, Shanterika, Waitrose, Escalade, Tiara and Malibu.
"I'm hoping to have a boy next as I'm quite partial to the name 'Avatar'. I think you'll find it's a type of vodka."
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