Wedding video maker sued for accurate portrayal of tedious day
A CAMERAMAN faces legal action after failing to make a wedding look better than it actually was.
The silhouetted kiss was accompanied by typically derisive remarks about the bride's 'clown make-up'
Professional videographer Tom Logan was paid to document Louise Malley’s seemingly endless celebrations at an Oxfordshire country house.
But when the bride and her husband Stephen received the 90-minute tape, it contained only a depressingly accurate portrayal of an event that was enjoyed solely by the bride and the bride’s grandmother.
Mrs Malley said: “The video just makes it look like a lot of uncomortable people in an over-priced room doing something they’d rather not.
“All I wanted was for it to look like the single most amazingly magical, fairy-dust sprinkled event in recorded human history and for my arse to look small.
“I’ll have the fucker’s house for this.”
But Logan said: “There is a clause in my contract that clearly states you cannot polish a turd.
“Most of these things are on a sliding scale between grinding mediocrity and stab-yourself-in-the-heart-with-a-fork tedium.
“Perhaps the next time Mrs Malley gets married she won’t spunk all the money on a venue she can’t afford and then expect a hundred people to share a dozen bottles of antiseptic-grade white wine.”
He added: “Experts agree that the secret to a magical celebration of everlasting love is a shit ton of free booze.
“And skip the disco as well. Load of piss.”
