Spotted!
11-06-10
This week's hot star sightings...
Unemployed
South Bank Show janitor
MELVYN BRAGG sitting alone in a park in West London, feeding birds from a bag of sawdust and trying to lick the tip of his own nose…
Sky News arsehole
KAY BURLEY standing in the timber-cutting queue at B&Q in Stalybridge, growing increasingly irritated at having to wait, then tapping her heels together and shouting 'Take me back to Paradise City!'…
Esteemed tuba soloist
BRIAN ENO trying out his latest invention, a pair of pneumatic stilts that he claims can make a jogging a thing of the past and free up 140 million extra man-hours a year to be devoted to colonising Mars instead - What a wizz kid!
Roly-poly bastard
JAMES CORDEN dressed as a fox and marching down Streatham High Street, roaring 'Do you really want to hurt me?'. He was pulling a toy beagle on wheels behind him…
Former part-time human
SIR FRED GOODWIN limbering up at the side of the pitch as a group of teenagers played hockey with an apple and some umbrellas. When they wouldn't let him play, he threatened legal action…
Veteran Welsh bean bag
NERYS HUGHES workshopping a character for a forthcoming play or film by rollerblading into Poundland and buying a bag of ping pong balls, a massive felt tip pen and a set of screwdrivers.
For a pound!
