MORNING everyone, and welcome to a busy stretch of the M25 where some crazed lunatic has taken it upon himself to cut his fellow drivers up, with little or no consideration for other motorists. The consequences of the sort of driving we've just witnessed could've been disastrous.
With Jimmy Conway and Tommy DeVito
With a door
One, two, three, four
Ready to play
What's the day?
It's Tuesday you dumb fuck
By Karen Fenessey
"Not only will this take valuable time away from the significant
contribution veiled women make to the French economy via online poker,
but will also interfere with prayer mat routines and cooking along with
Shakespeareâ€™s been teaching me how to play darts and I'm entered into a
tournament next week. Darts is a bit different up here - this is Heaven
so it's obviously well fucking better.
SIR IAN BOTHAM in his local post office, asking how much it would
cost to send a two-litre bottle of sarsaparilla to North Korea...
'Sir Arthur used it to catch the dead ones out of The Golden Girls
and gently lick their faces before letting them go again. Cheeky
Gizmo news and reviews with Nicholas Bispen
FANS of the troubled Pernice Boomerang handset have been disappointed following the long-delayed launch of the v-shaped personal organiser.
"OI you, saggy flaps!" I shouted at the trolley dolly as she walked down the aisle to serve one of my six bodyguards, "I think you'll find that this is only a triple measure of Jack and I specifically asked for a quadruple. Be a luv and bring us the bottle."