Opinion

I'm Having A Picnic And Everyone's Invited!

By David Cameron

GLOBAL warming is a threat to us all. I'm really serious about this. It will cause untold misery for millions across the globe and change the way we live, for ever. But in the meantime it does mean lots and lots of lovely weather. And what's the absolute best thing to do when the sun shines? Have a picnic!

One Woman's Week: The Path To True Love

By Karen Fenessey 

LAST night, I went to a live gig in a dingy little bar in the city centre. I’d rather not spend my evenings in some dark, sticky dump surrounded by penniless, drug-smoking layabouts, but I had an obligation to be there, because my boyfriend, Donny, is a singer/songwriter in a band.

If It's Alright With You, I'd Quite Like A Fridge

By Yen Xiao, farmer, Jiangsu Province

HERE in China, life is hard. I'm sure you've read many newspaper articles about our booming economy and burgeoning middle class, but the vast majority of Chinese still rely on subsistence farming and have no access to modern sanitation, electricity and labour saving devices.

One Woman's Week: A Blast From The Past

BY KAREN FENESSEY 

I HAD a great weekend but I wish it could have lasted longer - it's a pain having to go back to work and be surrounded by needy little children all day.

Mr Salmond's 'Independent Contraption' Will Never Burrow To The Centre Of The Earth

April 26, 1897, Edinburgh

Sirs,
It is with the utmost urgency that I write to you, my fellows of the Royal Society of Scotland, to alert you to the danger posed by Mr A Salmond and his proposal to build a steam driven contraption with the intention of burrowing to the centre of the Earth.

One Woman's Week: Cruel To Be Kind

BY KAREN FENESSEY 

I've got no tolerance for children who answer back to adults. I'm a teacher, so I've got a lot of experience of this, and as far as I am concerned they can burn in hell.

One Woman's Week: My Struggle Against Racism

BY KAREN FENESSEY 

There are some things in life which make me feel sick to my stomach. I don't know if you've ever seen the film The Colour Purple, but if you have, then you will understand what I am talking about.

The First Rule Of Toddler Fight Club Is...

You do not talk about Toddler Fight Club.