MEMBERS of Parliament are sure their 11 percent pay rise will eventually be seen as a political masterstroke.
GEORGE Osborne last night revealed he has a new dog called Lola that he currently has no plans to hurt.
DAVID and Samantha Cameron have demonstrated to the UK how to discuss opting in for internet pornography.
ED Miliband told former Co-op Bank chairman Paul Flowers to buy 'as much crack cocaine as he could possibly afford'.
YOUNGER voters associate the Conservatives with prickish behaviour, according to new research.
MILLIONAIRE Paul Sykes has followed up his pledge to fund UKIP with more outlandish and pointless spending.
GEORGE Osborne is to announce multi-billion pound service cuts with more than 16,000 white diamonds glued to his body.
THE Work and Pensions Secretary is to spend the next 4,570 nights stacking shelves at Poundland.