THE past three years have been a decadent boom era that must now end, the chancellor has declared.
THE health secretary has wept for all the patients left to suffer ingrowing toenails by the selfishness of junior doctors.
THE Conservative Party is continuing to pretend the EU referendum will not leave it completely and utterly f**ked.
BITTER infighting over Europe has led Conservatives to question whether it was a good idea to join a party known for being horrible to people.
BREXIT campaigners are puzzled as to why the movement is attracting so many lunatic conspiracy theorists.
A EUROSCEPTIC has claimed that, like Michael Gove, he has seen strong friendships crumble because of his refusal to accept the diktats of Brussels.
BRITAIN is to set to quit the European Union because the massive, blond-haired child says so.
MICHAEL Fallon broke out in a cold sweat earlier after realising Jeremy Corbyn’s name had not passed his lips for almost three hours.