Politics
May offered me drugs, claims Juncker
EUROPEAN Commission president Jean-Claude Juncker claimed the prime minister offered him a range of narcotics over dinner.
May promises she won't raise VAT or call a snap election
THERESA May has pledged not to raise VAT or to call a snap general election ever.
Poll reveals no-one has ever met anyone who has taken part in a poll
THE number of people who know someone who has taken part in an opinion poll is zero, according to a new poll.
May admits she got ‘strong and stable’ from leaflet about erectile dysfunction
THERESA May has been forced to admit her ‘strong and stable’ catchphrase was lifted from an NHS leaflet about erectile dysfunction.
Britain begs for even earlier election
THE public has urged the prime minister to call an even earlier election, like next Tuesday, so this bullshit can end.
Beat me harder this time, begs Goldsmith
ZAC Goldsmith has begged voters in Richmond Park to beat him again and harder because he is a contemptible worm who deserves it.
May considering bringing back workhouses for a laugh
THERESA May is so confident of her election victory that she is toying with bringing back workhouses just because she could.
The f**k is a mugwump? asks Corbyn
JEREMY Corbyn has made a private call to Downing Street to ask what the fuck a mugwump is and if he is meant to be offended.
- Tim Farron: I do not hate 'the gays'
- Gran who doesn’t understand politics really impressed by Theresa May
- UKIP to ban snoods, foreign cheese and all curries hotter than a rogan josh
- We will vote Conservative because we deserve to be punished, says Britain
- My government is a weak, unstable, leaderless rabble, says May in interview slip