Labour member has tiny Jeremy Corbyn on left shoulder and tiny Yvette Cooper on right

A LABOUR party member is constantly evaluating the contradictory advice given by the two tiny leadership candidates on each shoulder.

Labour MPs change names to Eric Pickles

ALMOST 80 per cent of Labour MPs have applied to change their name to Eric Pickles, it has emerged.

Tim Farron promises to lead Liberal Democrats out of room

NEW Liberal Democrat leader Tim Farron has vowed to lead the party’s eight MPs out of the meeting room they are currently confined in.

Dads approve Corbyn’s functional beige clothing

MIDDLE-AGED men have expressed approval for Jeremy Corbyn’s practical, biscuit-coloured attire.

Labour split on how to self-destruct

LABOUR members are divided on how best to lock the party out of power for a generation, it has emerged.

Child poverty renamed ‘infant cash flow problems'

THE government has announced that child poverty is now known as infant cash flow problems.

IDS fires Kalashnikov into air

IAIN Duncan Smith has been reprimanded for firing a machine gun into the air following yesterday's budget speech. 

‘Andy Burnham’ a composite designed by Labour committee

THE  Labour leadership favourite was created using Photoshop and a computer programmed regional accent, it has emerged.