MPs convinced pay rise will be a vote-winner

MEMBERS of Parliament are sure their 11 percent pay rise will eventually be seen as a political masterstroke.

I’m probably not going to hurt this dog, says Osborne

GEORGE Osborne last night revealed he has a new dog called Lola that he currently has no plans to hurt.

Camerons have 'the porn chat' on live TV

DAVID and Samantha Cameron have demonstrated to the UK how to discuss opting in for internet pornography.

Miliband ‘urged Co-op boss to buy more crack’

ED Miliband told former Co-op Bank chairman Paul Flowers to buy 'as much crack cocaine as he could possibly afford'.

Tories seen less as 'party of the rich' than 'bunch of pricks'

YOUNGER voters associate the Conservatives with prickish behaviour, according to new research.

UKIP donor buys 300-foot floating dog

MILLIONAIRE Paul Sykes has followed up his pledge to fund UKIP with more outlandish and pointless spending.

George Osborne to announce cuts while covered in diamonds

GEORGE Osborne is to announce multi-billion pound service cuts with more than 16,000 white diamonds glued to his body.

Iain Duncan Smith to stack all those shelves himself

THE Work and Pensions Secretary is to spend the next 4,570 nights stacking shelves at Poundland.