Jogger 'stable' after brushing against toxic amphibian

THE jogger who triggered David Cameron’s poison glands is being cared for at home by relatives.

Government cracks down on internet sarcasm

THE government has announced tough new penalties for individuals using sarcasm online.

Ed Miliband is unpaid intern

LABOUR leader Ed Miliband is still technically on work experience and has yet to receive a wage.

UKIP attracting Labour voters who are fed up and stupid

UKIP is attracting thousands of Labour voters who have rejected mainstream politics and basic intelligence.

UKIP MP strangely familiar

VOTERS have got the feeling they have seen UKIP's first MP somewhere before.

Lib Dem conference has ambience of a porno cinema

THE Liberal Democrat conference has recreated the sleazy atmosphere of an old-fashioned adult movie cinema.

Does ‘extremists’ include Russell Brand? asks everyone

BRITAIN will accept diminished civil rights if it means less Russell Brand on the television, it has emerged.

Duncan Smith ahead in f**king stupid ideas sweepstake

IAIN Duncan Smith is tipped to win a bet on who can come up with the most idiotic idea at the Tory conference.