David Cameron owns machine

THE prime minister has a machine and it makes bread.

Cameron announces £10 billion of legacy f*ck-ups

THE prime minister has announced £10 billion in groundbreaking legacy projects that will fail massively when someone else is in charge.

Ed Miliband still searching for his Kinnock-in-the-sea moment

ED Miliband has admitted that he's still looking for the moment that will indelibly define him as a bell-end.

Britons flock to Labour Party conference

EXCITED Britons have been rushing to see their favourite Labour politicians at the party conference in Brighton.

Clegg fires 2015 election pledges into the sun

THE Liberal Democrats' 2015 election promises have been put into a metal tube and blasted into the heart of the solar system.

Yes, I suppose I am a bit like Jesus, admits Huhne

FORMER cabinet minister Chris Huhne has been forced to admit he is basically a modern day Christ.

Cameron to hold Obama's jacket in Putin confrontation

PRESIDENT Obama has arranged for David Cameron to hold his jacket during a heated exchange on Syria with Vladimir Putin.