Gordon Brown's Raging Psychosis: Part 4,680

OH hello there, today's story of schizoid behaviour involves the chancellor, Alistair Darling...

Brown's Insanity 'Distracting Voters From How Bad He Is At His Job'

CONSTANT coverage of Gordon Brown's psychosis is beginning to distract voters from how appalling he is at being prime minister, Labour strategists claimed last night.

Brown Threatens To Destroy Anti-Bullying Charity

GORDON Brown dismissed claims of bullying last night and threatened to ruin the life of anyone who says different.

Cameron 'Partial To A Spot Of Light Porn'

TORY leader Dave Cameron has revealed he enjoys watching 'erotic thrillers' on late night television after the wife has gone to bed.

Brown Threatens To Fly Plane Into Office Of National Statistics

GORDON Brown was circling central London today threatening to crash his light aircraft into the Office of National Statistics.

Brown Waits To See If Britain Is That Stupid

GORDON Brown was today waiting for opinion poll results that will reveal whether or not Britain really is that stupid.

Dimwitted Mediocrities 'Not Above The Law'

DIMWITS and mediocrities too stupid to get a proper job are not above the law, according to a legal expert.

Half Of MPs Lie Their Way Out Of Repaying Expenses

HALF of all MPs will be forced to repay expenses while the other half have somehow managed to lie their way out of it, according to a report published today.