Politics

Duncan Smith in desperate bid to avoid his own reflection

IAIN Duncan Smith is today trying desperately to drown out the voices in his head and avoid seeing himself in a mirror.

I forgot to resign over benefit cuts last year, confirms Duncan Smith

IAIN Duncan Smith would have resigned over benefit cuts last year, but got distracted by ‘stuff’.

Government to struggle on without Duncan Smith’s warmth and charm

DAVID Cameron’s government is in crisis after losing its most popular member.

Osborne's words obscured by desire to punch him in face

GEORGE Osborne has said some things but you are more interested in what it would feel like to belt him, it has emerged.

Last three years retroactively classified as good times that are now over

THE past three years have been a decadent boom era that must now end, the chancellor has declared.

Jeremy Hunt weeps for ingrowing toenail sufferers

THE health secretary has wept for all the patients left to suffer ingrowing toenails by the selfishness of junior doctors. 

Conservative Party pretending it’s not completely f**ked

THE Conservative Party is continuing to pretend the EU referendum will not leave it completely and utterly f**ked.

Tories regret joining party full of horrible bastards

BITTER infighting over Europe has led Conservatives to question whether it was a good idea to join a party known for being horrible to people.