Child poverty renamed ‘infant cash flow problems'

THE government has announced that child poverty is now known as infant cash flow problems.

IDS fires Kalashnikov into air

IAIN Duncan Smith has been reprimanded for firing a machine gun into the air following yesterday's budget speech. 

‘Andy Burnham’ a composite designed by Labour committee

THE  Labour leadership favourite was created using Photoshop and a computer programmed regional accent, it has emerged.

Next Labour PM celebrates 10th birthday

THE boy who will be Britain’s next Labour Prime Minister in 2056 turned 10 years old yesterday.

Cameron moves Syria Post-it to eye-level

DAVID Cameron has decisively moved a Post-it note reading “Action on Syria?!?” to eye-level on his fridge door.

Child poverty was invented for Oliver! says IDS

CHILD poverty was created by Lionel Bart for the 1968 musical Oliver!, the work and pensions secretary has claimed.

March all you f**king like, says Osborne

GEORGE Osborne has told anti-austerity protestors to knock themselves out when it comes to marching.

Corbyn in last-minute bid to be completely ignored

JEREMY Corbyn is fighting to secure the 35 nominations he needs to fail in his leadership bid.