Labour ‘only doing better because May is utterly shit’

LABOUR should not assume they are great just because voters really loathe Theresa May, experts have warned.

Delegates at the party conference have been advised that recent electoral gains could be entirely due to May being incredibly shit at everything political.

Professor Henry Brubaker of the Institute for Studies said: “There may be some public interest in Labour’s policies but it’s more likely voters thought, ‘I’d rather vote for a dead squirrel than May.’

“It’s assumed Corbyn is respected for his principles, but it could just be that he doesn’t wear brown leather flares or belted trouser suits that make him look like one of Dr No’s henchmen.

“As a result Labour could face a tough electoral battle if the Tories replace May with literally anyone who isn’t her, whether it’s a random woman from a cafe or the Chuckle Brothers.”

Voter Nikki Hollis said: “I think what appeals to me most about Labour is the way Theresa May isn’t in it.”