SNP leader Alex Salmond provoked religious fury last night after announcing he was now more popular than Jesus Christ.

Salmond: supernatural astronaut

Salmond told reporters: "It's getting really crazy now. Women are screaming at the sight of me. People are giving me insane amounts of money.

"There's even a village in Lochaber where I'm worshiped as some kind of supernatural astronaut."

He added: "I'm starting to know what Jesus felt like. In fact, I doubt that even Jesus could have coped with this kind of attention."

But Church of Scotland Moderator, the Right Rev Alan McDonald, hit back with a passionate defence of the founder of Christianity. 

"I would remind Mr Salmond that Jesus had a very busy schedule. He performed several miracles, organised a large dinner party, was then nailed up, stabbed with a spear and still found time to conquer death.

"So I'm quite sure he could survive a bit of glad-handing at Braehead shopping centre and half an hour with Bernard Ponsonby."

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