News

Butler from On The Buses to guest-edit Daily Mail

CHEEKY 70s bus driver Stan Butler has been appointed guest editor of the Daily Mail.

It’s just a bit of fun, says soulless, hate-filled editor of Daily Mail

DAILY Mail editor Paul Dacre insisted his ‘legs-it’ front page was ‘a bit of fun’ in a voice that made everyone think of a derelict Victorian hospital.

Kids allowed on term time holidays if they bring back cheap fags and some Grappa

CHILDREN will be allowed to travel abroad during term time as long as they bring back booze and fags for teachers.

Scientists confirm we are all living in Ed Sheeran's dream

OUR reality is just a dream in the mind of sleeping Ed Sheeran, it has been confirmed.

No-one surprised to discover strange colleague was homeschooled

WORKERS have expressed no surprise that their strange new colleague was educated by his parents.

Regret spreading across face of woman who just bit into Creme Egg

A WOMAN'S excitement at eating a Creme Egg is visibly turning to remorse.

Cultural thing weirdly not in London

A CULTURAL event is unaccountably taking place outside of London, it has emerged.

People indifferent to important things passionately defend leggings

PEOPLE who are generally not that engaged with world events have stepped up to defend stretchy jogging bottoms.