News

I can destroy you, Moira Stewart tells self-assessment taxpayers

20-01-12

MOIRA Stewart, the all-seeing God of Tax, has warned of great suffering for those self-employed workers whose forms displease her.

'The real victims of phone hacking are the people who loathe John Prescott'

19-01-12
THE forgotten victims of the phone hacking scandal are the millions who would love to see John Prescott living under a bridge, it was claimed today.

Doctors to strike over ban on urine extraction

19-01-12
DOCTORS are to strike after the government banned their right to continually demand urine from their patients.

Italian cruise captain rode moped and pinched arses on sinking ship

19-01-12
THE captain of the Costa Concordia abandoned his post to buzz around the deck on a Vespa sexually harassing female passengers, it has emerged.

Thanks, but we have enough money, say tube drivers

19-01-12

UNDERGROUND train drivers have rejected an offer of some extra money for no reason, because they are fine.

Cameron attacks Argentina's half-arsed colonialism

19-01-12

DAVID Cameron has offered to show Argentina how to swagger around in someone else's country properly.

McDonald's introduces 'Bring Your Bassist to Work Day'

18-01-12
STAFF at McDonald's have enjoyed their first Bring Your Favourite Britpop Bassist to Work Day.

The Mashipedia Emergency Fact Service

18-01-12
WITH Wikipedia laid low by chronic indignation, the Daily Mash has unselfishly stepped into the breach with a list of today's Top Ten Must-Have facts.

The new Mash Book - Welcome to the Mental Hospital

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