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QUEEN AND PRINCE PHILIP CELEBRATE 60 YEARS OF RACIAL EPITHETS

THE Queen has paid tribute to her husband as one of Britain's most accomplished post-war racists.

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BRAZILIANS TO BE SHAVED BY GOVERNMENT

THE Government is to introduce new regulations governing the size of the Brazilian wax amid mounting fears that the nation’s pubic hair is spiralling out of control. 

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BROWN VOWS TO END Wii POSTCODE LOTTERY

GORDON Brown has taken personal charge of the escalating Nintendo Wii crisis which could force millions of British children to play outdoors with real friends this Christmas.

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Opinion

GUEST BLOG: NOEL GALLAGHER

THE Olympics - what the fuck was that all about? Every morning, right, that Scottish bird off the telly would sit on a sofa telling us that we'd won a bronze medal in the women’s catapult and that everyone could now go to work with a big smile on their face - in retrospect I think she somehow mistook me for somebody who gives a fuck.

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