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RMT USING TUBE TUNNELS TO REHEARSE 'THE MIKADO'

LONDON tube drivers are using strike action as a cover so they can stage last-minute rehearsals of their new production of The Mikado.
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DRINKS COMPANIES TO THROW LAGER INTO SCHOOL PLAYGROUNDS

DRINKS manufacturers will start lobbing cans of lager over school gates if alcohol adverts are banned before the 9pm watershed, the Daily Mash has learned.
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ALL PARENTS KILLING THEIR CHILDREN SAY GOVERNMENT

EVERY parent in Britain is to be charged with the attempted murder of their own offspring under the latest Government proposals to combat child obesity.
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Opinion

LORD COE'S OLYMPIC BLOG

LORD Sebastian Coe is one of life's winners, whether I'm thrashing Steve Ovett to take the 1500m gold in Moscow, single-handedly bringing the Olympics back to London, or becoming head boy by exposing my rivals as communist sympathisers.
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