News

London in grip of normality

LONDON is today in the grip of normality, with millions having their breakfast then going to work.

But this is a MacBook, says air passenger

A PASSENGER on a Jeddah-London flight has explained that while laptops may be banned he has a MacBook, which is different.

Google introduces 'You should probably just break up' alert

GOOGLE has introduced a new tool for users who keep doing searches about whether their partner is really 'the one'.

Rising inflation explained as 'the 70s'

ECONOMISTS have explained what rising inflation means by asking if you remember the fourth-hand Chopper bike you got for your birthday in 1978.

Irishman praying colleagues stop talking about Ireland

AN IRISHMAN working in the UK is praying colleagues will end an embarrassingly ill-informed chat about Ireland, it has emerged.

Spring vastly overrated

SPRING is more or less the same as winter, it has been confirmed.

Man who claims to be European getting on everyone's tits

A MAN who keeps saying he sees himself as European is rapidly becoming very annoying, everyone has decided.

Woman makes three new friends every time she visits a toilet

A MAN cannot understand how his girlfriend returns from a 'quick wee' with several phone numbers and someone's life story.