News

Quiche just pizza's unemployed cousin 

QUICHE is just an underachieving distant relative of pizza, scientists have discovered. 

People discovered who drink wine for its flavour

THERE are people who enjoy wine as something other than a means of getting wasted, it has been claimed.

Morrissey to donate all proceeds from new single to bastards

FORMER Smiths frontman Morrissey has released a charity single raising funds for utter bastards.

I treat male and female employees exactly the same, boss tells worker's breasts

A BOSS has explained his non-sexist approach to a female worker while staring directly at her chest.

Merkel, Mugabe and May on conference call

THERESA May, Robert Mugabe and Angela Merkel are on a conference call about how to remain in power without popular support. 

Old hippyish man who didn't murder anyone dies

AN OLD bearded man, who was around in the 60s but didn’t do any murders, has died.

'We're very lucky' say couple who clearly mean 'we're amazing'

A SUCCESSFUL couple have put it all down to luck while also not wanting you to believe that.

Londoners obediently queueing for some bullshit

A QUEUE of Londoners don’t even know what bullshit they are lining up for, they have confirmed.