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19-05-09 |
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 NICK Brown, the Labour chief whip, has defended his £19,000 food bill, insisting it is not cheap to feed a pet cheetah these days.
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18-05-09 |
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 MICHAEL Martin, the Chief Shit, was clinging to office last night amid a growing revolt by all the other stinking turds.
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18-05-09 |
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 MPs from all parties last night demanded a ban on the gigantic, irresistible, state of the art television sets at the root of the House of Commons expenses scandal.
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15-05-09 |
 THE audience from BBC1's Question Time was marching on London last night, parading the severed head of housing minister Margaret Beckett on a pike, like some kind of ghoulish mascot.
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14-05-09 |
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 LABOUR MP Elliot Morley was last night confirmed as the first person in the history of the world to forget he had paid off his mortgage.
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13-05-09 |
 THE war of political apologies escalated last night as prime minister Gordon Brown pledged all his clothes to a charity shop and began wandering about in the buff. |
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12-05-09 |
 THE Tories last night proved they have still got it after it was revealed that a senior MP claimed more than £2000 for drawbridge wax and moat freshener.
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11-05-09 |
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 THE system of parliamentary expenses is a corrupt, scum-sucking, piece-of-shit, bastarding thief, MPs insisted last night.
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08-05-09 |
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 GORDON Brown was prime minister in name only last night as the machinery of state was transferred to New Avengers actress Joanna Lumley.
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