Politics

Ed Miliband to join Scooby Doo Gang
ED Miliband is to quit the Labour leadership and join a gang of amateur detectives led by a ravenous Great Dane.

Gove kidnapped by Marxist militants
MICHAEL Gove has been abducted by the militant Marxist group Enemies of Promise.

This housing boom will be perfect, says Osborne
GEORGE Osborne has reassured Britain that the new housing boom he is trying to create will never, ever end.

Osborne putting off doing Budget
GEORGE Osborne is putting off doing the Budget with a series of trivial distractions.

Britons reclassified as snails
UK RESIDENTS are to be reclassified as snails, in a government bid to avoid the jurisdiction of the European Court of Human Rights.

Tories beaten by 'perfect storm' of Huhne, Rennard and nutjobs
THE Tories admitted there was no way they could have won the Eastleigh by-election as their opponents were either mired in scandal or completely insane.
