Sport

Chelsea-Man U 'a great advert for atheism'
06-02-12
SUPPORTERS of every other team in the country say the 3-3 match at
Stamford Bridge yesterday was definitive proof of a godless universe.
Capello advised not to select anybody
03-02-12
FABIO Capello has been asked to submit an empty team sheet for Euro 2012 to avoid selecting gits.
Transfer window round-up, with Brian Sewell
02-02-12
JANUARY is traditionally the month in which my friends and I assess our
collections to see which pieces are surplus to requirement and arrange
an auction at the Garrick.
Andy Carroll listed on Ebay
30-01-12
LIVERPOOL has placed former striker Andy Carroll on the auction site Ebay with a reserve price of 99p.
Evra gets 24-hour protection from cheeky Scouse wit
27-01-12
PATRICE Evra has hired bodyguards to deal with loveable Liverpool rogues good-naturedly threatening to kill him.

Police investigate allegations of reasonable criticism
23-01-12
CHELSEA fans are being investigated after several were reportedly heard making balanced, cogent points about opposition players.

Critics disguised themselves as players, says Warnock
20-01-12
NEIL Warnock has blamed critics for his dismissal, claiming they posed as opposition footballers that kept beating his team.

Spurs fan to wake up in a damp bed
16-01-12
THE Tottenham Hotspur fan whose dream we are all part of will wake soon,
blinking this universe out of existence, experts have claimed.

Everyone to start supporting Barnet
12-01-12
FOOTBALL supporters are to switch their allegiance to a team whose scumbags they have never heard of.


