We feel just awful for you, England tells Scotland

ENGLAND has confessed to feeling just torn apart by Scotland’s failure to qualify for Euro 2016.

Arsene Wenger hasn’t eaten food since 1972

ARSENAL manager Arsene Wenger has not consumed solid food for over 45 years.

Jury service to include being Sunderland manager for 10 days

THE job of managing Sunderland football club is to be given to someone randomly selected from the Electoral Roll.

Liverpool fans demand to know why potential new manager hasn’t turned things around yet

LIVERPOOL fans are demanding the dismissal of the man who has yet to be confirmed as the club’s new manager.

Rooney inspiring kids to guzzle Yum Yums and burn out at 29

WAYNE Rooney has inspired millions of young Britons to phone it in while gorging on sticky buns.

Rodgers sacking 'all part of his masterplan'

BRENDAN Rodgers has confirmed that being fired was something he had planned all along.

England fans to support Australia for rest of World Cup

ENGLAND rugby fans have vowed to cheer Australia all the way to the World Cup final.

Getting served at the bar confirmed as Olympic sport

'GETTING served' is to be an event at the 2020 Tokyo Olympics.