Mirallas unsuccessfully tries to park Baines’s car

EVERTON midfielder Kevin Mirallas has damaged team mate Leighton Baines’s car after deciding to park it for him.

PE lessons to focus on snooker and darts

SCHOOL sports lessons are to move away from more ‘physical’ activities to focus on darts and snooker.

World would be better place if we all watched snooker

LIFE on earth would be less violent if everyone just sat down and watched the snooker, it has emerged.

Concept of numbers explained to Poyet

SUNDERLAND manager Gustavo Poyet has learned the meaning of numbers like 32, three and a half, and 80,000, one day too late.

Ronaldo to use solid gold ball for rest of season

CRISTIANO Ronaldo has pledged to take free-kicks with a solid gold ball.

Leeds United's Stephen Warnock wins Ballon d'Or

LEEDS United full-back Stephen Warnock has been awarded the Ballon d'Or.

LA Galaxy to create mini-Liverpool for Gerrard

AMERICAN soccer club LA Galaxy is to create a $12 million ‘Scouse-o-dome’ in the heart of California to make Steven Gerrard feel at home.

David Ospina found trapped behind transfer window

ARSENAL goalkeeper David Ospina was trapped for months behind the transfer window, it has emerged.