Keane ‘may return to muttering threateningly at bus stops’

ROY Keane may go back to his previous role muttering threatening remarks at bus stops, it has emerged.

Balotelli was trying to infiltrate Real Madrid

MARIO Balotelli has explained he swapped shirts with Real Madrid at half-time to go undercover and win the game for Liverpool.

Man City struggled without familiar chorus of boos

MANCHESTER City captain Vincent Kompany has admitted his side was distracted against CSKA Moscow by the lack of abusive chanting.

Sunderland fans to have memories wiped

SUNDERLAND players have paid to have fans' memories of their defeat by Southampton surgically deleted.

Liverpool victory just Raheem Sterling's dream

LIVERPOOL'S 3-2 victory against QPR only happened in striker Raheem Sterling's sleeping mind, the FA has confirmed.

Wales dreaming of nearly qualifying for Euro 2016

WELSH footballers are hoping to only just miss out on Euro 2016, it has emerged.

Five-man England beats ten-man Estonia

ENGLAND beat a depleted Estonia yesterday despite only having five decent players.