Sport

5000m triumph definitely wasn't worth all the pain, says Farah

BRITAIN'S 5000m world champion Mo Farah has admitted that in retrospect he wishes he hadn't bothered.


England to top international hype table

VICTORY over Wales tomorrow will see England confirmed as the team with the most unrealistic set of fans in the world.

Transfer deadline day, with Brian Sewell

AS everybody is surely aware, each February 20th is a dizzying whirl of excitement as the nation’s orchestras jostle to restock their ranks.

Compensation offer to bankrupt English football

ARSENAL fans being given their money back for a dreadful away performance could set a legal precedent that will instantly kill 98 percent of English football.

Manchester definitely better than north London at one thing

MANCHESTER is better than north London at one thing and one thing only, it has been confirmed.

Up yours, BBC tells Ferguson

MATCH of the Day producers have welcomed the opportunity to completely ignore Sir Alex Ferguson.

QPR stockpiling gits

NEIL Warnock is building a fortress of arseholes in West London, it emerged last night.

Nasri set to wander earth righting wrongs

SAMIR Nasri will spend the rest of his career going from club to club trying to do right, confirmed his agent.