LOUIS van Gaal has claimed that football must be freed from the shackles of maths.
MANAGERS have demanded a six-week break for exhausted players who have been at it since as far back as August.
GOLF’S governing body has voted to open its doors to heavily armed Jamaican gangsters.
CHELSEA is to pounce for a Romanian labelled ‘the next Lionel Messi’ as soon as his umbilical cord is cut.
MANCHESTER United's Angel Di Maria is excited about watching the Champions League from his own sofa.
EVERY team in the Premier League has given up trying to win the title after only four games.
TOTTENHAM Hotspur is to play all home games next season on the internet while work on a new stadium is completed.
THAT Tom Cleverley is such a nice young man, according to your mum.