War

Afghans face three month RAF waiting list

AFGHAN civilians are facing a three month wait to be blown to smithereens, it has emerged.

Britain grants asylum to hilariously-named terrorist

BRITAIN last night offered safe haven to Colonel Gaddafi's charmingly-named terrorist sidekick.

I kind of assumed you're trying to kill me, says Gaddafi

COLONEL Gaddafi last night decided to just go ahead and assume that we are actively trying to kill him.

Planes kill baddies

LOTS of people died in Libya last night, but it's okay because they were baddies.

UN backs Radio 1 regime change

THE United Nations security council has paved the way for air strikes against Chris Moyles.

What gives? asks Tony the Prick

GOOMBA sleazeball Tony 'the Prick' Blair was being questioned today about his role in the Iraq war scamola.

Eggs regain terror status

EGGS are terrifying for the first time in more than 20 years, it has been confirmed.

Afghan war caused by MoD budget shenanigans, reveals email

THE war in Afghanistan was started so the Ministry of Defence could avoid a £13bn underspend, according to a leaked email.