Society

AS ALL non-Londoners and Donald Trump know, Sadiq Khan brought London under sharia law in 2016. One brave resident writes a diary of his daily oppression:

A WITHERING, up-and-down glance from another woman is more validating than any spoken compliment, women have confirmed.

A FORMER resident of Dubai who is now back in Britain doing badly is the toast of his friendship group, they have confirmed.

WHAT is the best university in the country? It’s largely as you’d expect, but we’ve thrown in a few wildcards to con upper middle class kids into spending three years on the Humber.

IT’S almost freshers' week, and as a parent you’ll want to ensure your child is suitably twattish as a student. Here’s how to give them the best start at uni. 

IT is fashionable to disparage British traditions, but who among us does not feel a swell of pride as a magnificent Royal carriage dating back to 1902 sweeps by containing a bloated orange pussy-grabber?

THE Unite the Kingdom march attracted hotel protestors from across the UK this weekend, but how many? Your political views hold the answer. Answer these questions.

THE RMT walkout has Londoners with absolutely no way they can possibly get to work, not counting all the others.

THE first person to arrive at any house party is always someone the hosts already regretted inviting, research has shown.

A MILLENNIAL has accepted his age after attempts to talk about drugs with younger colleagues left him sounding like a police officer.