MY granny also thinks Daniel O'Donnell is sexy so she is clearly off her head.
MY teacher, Edwina Pringle, probably has Love Actually in her top three films.
NEWSFLASH: Maths is for losers.
"It's becoming more and more of a struggle to look at my own big smug face staring back at me."
"I just want the one, just one teeny tiny little referendum and then I swear I'll be off them for good."
MY WIFE is a miserable cow.
IF I was in charge of America I would make it compulsory for everyone to get free pick 'n' mix for life.
Ask Holly: Looking like a badger entangled in a Laura Ashley sale rail doesn’t mean I’m not a leader
JUST because I slightly resemble Uncle Bulgaria doesn’t mean I’m a complete womble.
YOU'RE all worried about Trump and Brexit when the real threat is known only to us birdwatchers.
KIDS are used to being told to sod off.
I'VE NO idea about leather trousers but in our school nativity I'm sheep number seven.
THERE is no affliction which can't be cured with a Hatchimal for Christmas.