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Saturday, 16th February 2019
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Agony Aunt

Ask Holly: Everyone thinks X Factor is shit

A LONG time ago, before the internet was invented, people were ruled over by an evil dictator called Noel Edmonds,

Ask Holly: I am pleased with myself for winning Bake Off

WE DO baking at school but are not allowed to use sugar, or wheat, or milk.

Ask Holly: How can I make living in an embassy more interesting?

WHAT you really need is a dead cat to look at.

Ask Holly: Is Britain full?

THERE is no room in this country because the celebrities are taking it all up.

Ask Holly: We're only a week into 2016 and I've already set off a nuclear bomb

MY own resolution is to master the Force.

Ask Holly: When I'm pouting I'm thinking about Euclidian geometry

THERE are three boys in my class called Brooklyn.

Ask Holly: That odious cretin is a major investor in Lapland

HE'S a big ugly man whose name means 'fart'.

Ask Holly: I have no previous experience in expressing genuine emotion

YOU need to start doing stupid stuff on a regular basis.

  • Ask Holly: Are colouring books suitable for grown men?
  • Ask Holly: I've been married to Catherine Zeta Jones for 15 years, please help me
  • Ask Holly: I just found out that lots of people in this country have got absolutely no money
  • Ask Holly: Instagram destroyed my soul
  • Ask Holly: I'm tired of the thankless drudgery of full time parenting
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