Features

Useful things Meghan Markle could have bought instead of her wedding dress

AS the world waits to see Meghan's wedding dress we look at other things that cost £300,000, such as a four bedroom house in Scotland.

Being a virgin at 28 is nothing to do with my incredibly strange personality

WE LIVE in a world where sex is no longer a special thing between a man and a shy, pure woman untainted by other penises.

I'm torn between watching The Handmaid's Tale and doing something I might actually enjoy

IS THERE some way we could dismantle the patriarchy by watching Masterchef instead? 

What's the best ice cream to give your kid a hyperactive shit fit?

WHICH sweet frozen treat will most effectively turn your little angel into the maniacal spawn of Satan? Find out with this simple test.

Mirror, mirror, on the wall, am I a twat? by Johnny Depp

DEAR mirror, I have gazed into you for 11 hours a day over several decades and now I need to ask you something.

Are you confident or just a cock?

ARE you comfortable in your own skin, or just an obnoxious bastard? Take our test to find out.

Ask a Brexit doctor: Liam Fox answers your health questions

BELIEVE it or not, I am a real doctor and when I’m not negotiating superb trade deals I like to keep my hand in. Here I reply to your health queries.

Are you meant to be together, or have you just signed a two-year lease on a flat?

ARE you and partner destined to be together or have you just signed a legally-binding rent contract? Take our test to find out.