Brexit music festival cancelled due to everything about it

A MUSIC festival to promote Brexit has been cancelled because it was an incredibly terrible idea on every level, the organisers have revealed.

The ‘Bpop Live’ event had been dogged by problems including administrative wrangles, performers pulling out and being the worst thing ever conceived by humanity.

Promoter Roy Hobbs said: “When your headline acts are an Elvis impersonator and three members of Bucks Fizz that’s not a music festival, it’s just a weird dream.

“Nigel Farage was going to tell some jokes, but festivals don’t normally put crap comedians on the main stage. If Radiohead play Glastonbury I doubt they’ll have Tom O’Connor with them.

“Not many Brexiters would have come anyway because a lot are elderly and think festivals are full of dirty hippies with Hendrix perms injecting heroin and saying ‘man’.

“Given UKIP’s fascination with golliwogs we should have booked some acts from The Black and White Minstrel Show, but they’re not as popular now for some reason.”

UKIP supporter Donna Sheridan said: “I just don’t understand how a trendy new music festival with Nigel Farage, an orchestra and some of Bucks Fizz could go wrong.

“It’s clearly a conspiracy by the EU because they want to destroy traditional English culture like Making Your Mind Up.