Arts & Entertainment
HILLARY Clinton has written a new memoir explaining how she managed to deliver the world’s greatest superpower into the hands of a drooling orangutan.
FANS of BBC show Strictly Come Dancing are unsure whether they could accept single-sex couples doing something as deeply heterosexual as ballroom dancing.
THERE has been widespread outcry after it emerged that an 80s television programme was mostly just people dressing up as Nazis.
TONY Blair has described in detail what Star Wars should have been like, despite no one asking for his opinion.
NINTENDO has shocked fans by revealing that Mario is no longer a plumber but has some bullshit office job doing marketing.
A MAN has been listening to the Proclaimers for no reason other than that they made some great tunes.
AS the new series of Strictly begins, the British public faces the same old problem – which of these people is supposedly famous?
PENNYWISE the Dancing Clown from Stephen King’s It has announced his availability for childrens’ parties for nothing.
A HUNGOVER history teacher accidentally started teaching scenes from Game of Thrones as real events, it has emerged.
TAYLOR Swift's new song does not have deeper levels and is just a shit thing, it has been confirmed.
THE steamroller that crushed Terry Pratchett’s hard drive should also do Jeffrey Archer’s, it has been claimed.
MARY Berry has congratulated the hosts of Channel 4’s Great British Bake Off for betraying everything baking stands for.