Arts & Entertainment

Father-of-two ends summer holidays knowing full catalogue of Little Mix

A FATHER of two daughters has spent the last six weeks on an in-car crash course to learn every song by Little Mix.

Things they're going to bollocks up in Star Wars: Episode IX

THE latest Star Wars trilogy has included some incredible bollocks like space Leia and tedious moralising. So what nonsense will be in the final instalment?

Man discovers you can just claim you went to Notting Hill carnival

A LONDONER has discovered that you can simply claim you went to carnival and everyone believes you.

Reading Festival boasts 'best ever' line-up of people to throw piss at

EXCITED music fans cannot wait to decide which acts at the Reading Festival they will throw bottles of urine at.

Train delayed due to drama students in carriage

A TRAIN had to be held in a station while a group of dangerously annoying drama students were removed, it has emerged.

Dad thinks he's a f**king genius for working out obvious TV plot twist

A MAN is delighted to have been proved right about his incredibly obvious TV plot prediction.  

Any chance of a film that isn't for kids or idiots? ask filmgoers

ADULT filmgoers have been wondering if there is any chance studios could produce something that is not the cinematic equivalent of Haribos.

Man complains sci-fi film is 'a bit far-fetched'

A MAN has complained about a science fiction film being 'far-fetched' and 'unrealistic'.

Indie band reunites for one last argument

AN INDIE band from the Britpop era have announced they are reuniting for a final massive argument.

How not to be Madonna when you hit 60

ARE you wondering if you should be like Madonna when you hit the big 6-0? The answer is probably 'no', so here is a guide to not being an ageing pop megalomaniac in later life.

Woman asks friend for 'feedback' on incredibly shit children's book idea

A WOMAN found it hard to give positive feedback on a friend’s children's book idea because it was shockingly shite, it has emerged.

Twats up ante by going to foreign music festival

SMUG twats who live to outdo their friends have upped the ante by attending a music festival in Portugal.