A ‘LUCKY’ surfer has been rescued after surviving almost a full week in a soul-destroying position in an insurance office.
BRITONS face a race against time to spend their old £5 notes while they are still legal tender.
AN OFFICE worker has gone ahead and fired off an email in total disregard of his computer’s warning that it had no subject.
LEAVE voters have furiously turned on Blue Riband chocolate wafer biscuits to avoid losing face over Brexit.
AN OFFICE worker is struggling through Tuesday by focusing on making it to Wednesday, after which there are only two more days until the weekend.
NOBODY at John Lewis knows what its long-standing slogan is supposed to mean, it has been confirmed.
THE Bank of Mum and Dad has had to call on assistance from its grandparent bank after a year of substantial losses.
THE government's website for tax and benefits has either been hacked by Russia or is just a piece of shit.
A FARMER whose bright orange cider makes you shit yourself is not inspired by Brew Dog, he has confirmed.
BRITONS who would like to boycott Wetherspoons because of its chairman’s political views have admitted it is impossible.
THE new one pound coin would rather not be attached to a doomed currency, it has confirmed.
WORKERS have expressed no surprise that their strange new colleague was educated by his parents.