SOMETHING has happened to the Kardashians that does not affect you because they are strangers and you will never meet them.
WILLIAM Hague is keen to be implicated in the break-up of Angelina Jolie’s marriage.
PIPPA Middleton has confirmed plans to destroy the aristocracy from within.
COMPULSORY military service has been brought back for young people who have a large following on YouTube.
DAVID Cameron is planning to go to the pub tonight with Jamie Oliver and that cheese twat from Blur, Britons have been warned.
PERKY posterior beach body confidence ample cleavage, it has emerged.
THE -gate suffix, used for political scandals since 1972’s Watergate, has admitted that yesterday’s Traingate is a new low.
BRITAIN’S Olympians have brought shame upon the country by attempting to smuggle rare metals from Brazil.
WOMEN are opposed to Nicole Scherzinger, it has been confirmed.
WAYNE Hayes has worked with, played football against, babysat and lived next-door to each and every Great British Olympic medalist, weary colleagues have revealed.
THE 180,000 new registered Labour supporters thought they were buying exclusive front-row access to a Beyonce gig.
THE Queen has assured David Cameron that he was her worst prime minister ‘by miles’.