SINGER'S daughter Lisa Marie Presley is pregnant with an incredibly fat baby, she revealed last night.
IAN Paisley is to resign as Northern Ireland's first minister so he can devote more time to shouting abuse at the Pope.
THE jury in the Diana inquest yesterday asked the coroner to remind them why they are there.
ROYAL hero Prince Harry has spoken of his relief at being treated like an ordinary soldier who can come home whenever he feels like it.
IT is the biggest, most glamorous night of the year. It is the night when millionaires give each other awards for dressing up and pretending to be someone else.
THE number of BBC presenters in prison has reached a five-year high after Radio 1 DJ Groovewhittler was jailed for a second offence of dog frottage.
PRINCE Philip has denied claims he is a Nazi, insisting his passionate racism is merely a hobby.
EX-EASTENDERS character Nigel Bates is among the early favourites to represent the UK in this year's Eurovision Song Contest.
PRINCESS Diana led a secret life as a super-hero who was able to scale buildings and shoot a web-like material from her wrist, Harrods owner Mohamed Al Fayed claimed today.
NATASHA Kaplinsky will start each bulletin by staring straight into the camera and slowly sucking on her pencil as the new £1 million-a-year face of Five News.
THE small Swiss town of Davos was last night celebrating another successful year of A-grade horseshit and frenzied wanking.
HIS Royal Highness Prince William was in fine spirits last night after another absolutely spiffing day out.