TIME has once again been altered because of about a dozen people who still deliver milk or grow things.
IN every city street and country lane in Britain an abandoned facemask lies dirty and forlorn. But exactly who are the twats throwing them away, and why?
A NEW campaign is aiming to bring back discarded pornographic magazines to Britain’s woodlands.
UNFORTUNATELY it’s autumn, which means dead bits of trees are falling from their branches. Here’s how they plan to ruin your life.
A LARGE, omnivorous family living in a five-bedroom house with four acres of grounds would like to lecture you on protecting the environment.
A CAT has confirmed that it will do its utmost to shit exactly where you plan to tread in your front and back garden.
FOXES in your area have announced that one of the longest and loudest all-night orgies on record will begin the moment you try to get to sleep.
GRETA Thunberg has returned to school to find neither her teacher or any of her classmates noticed she was gone.
THE unusually hot weather is providing your parents with many exciting new ways to pester you. Here is some of their worst nonsense.
HAS your lovely holiday weather been brought to an end by a huge storm? Here’s eight things to do until it’s over.
EXPERTS have warned Britain to prepare for intense periods of mindless chatter about the weather when the heatwave breaks.
A STATIC caravan on the Isle of Wight has become a roasting tin capable of cooking a family of four in one hour 40 minutes, they have confirmed.